Everybody complains at some points of time in their life. We complain when things don’t get along with our way. We complain because we want things to be better and accordingly we find the solutions.
Yet there are certain people who complain almost everything – what had happened to them, what is happening and what will happen. Their attitude towards life is negatively wired by defective sides of almost everything. They don’t try to find the solution instead their complaints make them comfortable and completely lost in the world of self-pity.
We all feel important, we all feel that we are born with a purpose, we all have our defensive mechanism against negativity or any weapon that tries to shoot us down. Yet there are some people whose level of self-importance is overriding them.
They usually try to show they are important and they feel that they deserve special kind of treatment and respect by others.
When things went wrong against their intentions, they complain.
“Arrogance is believing you are right when actually you are not.”anonymous
Sometimes, an unfavourable situation happened but that doesn’t mean you should moan over it.
No sense of gratitude
In life, there is always a good side and a bad side. Sometimes the bad side overwhelmed us and vice-versa. However when you don’t have an acknowledgement for the good and positive side or the benefits you received from others/things, then there is something you want to ponder upon.
Feeling a sense of gratitude even for a little things shows how contented you are in your life.
Research shows that gratitude lowers cortisol levels, blood pressure as well as fatigue and depression.
*I am so happy because I’m so grateful for all the good things this life offers.
A tiny problem is a big problem
You have the tendency to create a bigger problem in your mental world, even though the real problem is ignorable. Suppose, you complain that since I have a small cut in my left-hand index finger, I won’t cook food or touch water or do anything.
Mild pain in one of your body parts makes you shut the work you are supposed to do. Because you feel you will do when everything gets back to normal. (Perfectionistic waiting)
Learn to ignore things that are too petty to consider as it may cause a big hindrance if you allow it to grow.
*Problems are adaptive & fertile. The only way to stop is to tolerate them.
People started noticing you
People started to notice your habits of complaints. Your friends or people around you call you by different names at times such as Complain King/Complain Queen, Complain box & Chatter. Or “say you have a lot of problems. Didn’t you?”
And they try to stay away from you. Or not picking up your phone calls.
Learn that people do complain but they don’t like a complainer. Your relationship with people should be healthy for both parties.
*In social relationship people want to maintain a good for all policy.
Regret overwhelms you.
You travel back to your past life many times a day. And you feel embarrassed and frustrated about your humiliating events or incidents. Or anything that goes against your conscience.
You complain I shouldn’t have said that or done that.
Such emotional pain on account of something done or experienced in the past, with a wish that it had been different will not bring any value instead it will affect your mental & physical health adversely.
*Regret brings nothing except pain.
You often talk about things that are outside your control
The weather – When it is too cold, you grumble. When it is too hot, you vent. When it is too humid, you grouse. Instead of ranting at this uncontrollable phenomena, better find ways to deal with it.
*I can’t change the law of the universe, I can only live with it.
You are feeling fatigued all the time
All complainers might not experience this, but some will. As when you complain and get angry, the stress levels go up and can cause you low energy. People with anxiety or depression mostly experience this syndrome.
*Fatigue has different roots. But the only root for me is my habit of giving mental pressure to myself.